Life's too short to eat bad food - Me

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic - Arthur C. Clarke

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

The Tale of Peta Rabbit

Freely adapted from a story by Andrew Galarneau, Food Editor of the Buffalo News and with apologies to Beatrix Potter.  Are you sitting comfortably?
Once upon a time, upon a time there
were four little Rabbits,
and their names were--
               Breakfast,
          Brunch,
    Lunch,
and Peta.



 
They lived with their Mother
in a sand-bank, underneath the
root of a very big fir tree.

 

"NOW, my dears," said old Mrs. Rabbit one morning, "you may go into the fields
or down the lane, but don't go
into Mr. McGregor's garden:
your Father had an accident
there; he was put in a pie by
Mrs. McGregor."


BUT Peta, who was very
naughty, ran straight
away to Mr. McGregor's
garden and squeezed under
the gate!



FIRST he ate some lettuces
and some French beans;
and then he ate some radishes.



I AM sorry to say that Peta
was not very well during
the evening.

 

BECAUSE Mr. McGregor shot him.






AND cleaned him. 







 
AND cut him into convenient serving pieces.






AND had him for dinner.

WHY? Mr. McGregor had a heart problem, and his doctor said, "I'll tell you what's far better for you: rabbit."

MRS. McGREGOR had eaten rabbit growing up, but the suggestion still made her a bit queasy. The McGregors had rabbits hopping around back home at their  farm -- her children's pets.

But the surgeon's point about the relative healthfulness of rabbit -- high in protein, low in cholesterol, fat and calories -- made her reconsider. The surgeon's advice was blunt, McGregor said. "Don't name 'em, and butcher the ugly ones."

OTHER medical professionals agreed.






 


 SOON healthy rabbit was available, fresh or frozen, in Farmer's Markets and Supermarkets alike. Local Chefs and Restaurateurs were quick to take note and added this delicious alternative to their menus. Poor Breakfast, Brunch, Lunch and Mrs. Rabbit.


 
CHEF "R" said let us braise him and serve him -- over pasta.





 
BUT his Sous Chef, "W", said no.  "Sausage is always delicious."




 
CHEF "H" declared "au contraire - everything tastes better grilled!" 






 
CHEF "G" said "No, muthaf**kahs. Pâté







 
. . .or Torchon!





 


CHEF "A" said "it needs a touch of the East. Perhaps Tempura?


 


OR Panko Crust?"





 



OTHER Chef "G" demurred. "This needs the magic of Cajun seasoning!"




THE moral of this story is that while rabbits are cute and cuddly in Children's tales, in real life they are delicious AND good for you to enjoy with the whole family.

AND if you have to call a restaurant about serving Fuzzy Bunny - make reservations.

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Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
- Arthur C. Clarke

Life's too short to eat bad food -
Me